


Trip

by Warp5Complex_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-03-06
Updated: 2006-03-06
Packaged: 2018-08-16 01:06:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8080768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warp5Complex_Archivist/pseuds/Warp5Complex_Archivist
Summary: Trip thinks about Malcolm. (03/07/2004)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Kylie Lee, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Warp 5 Complex](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Warp_5_Complex), the software of which ceased to be maintained and created a security hazard. To make future maintenance and archive growth easier, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but I may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Warp 5 Complex collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Warp5Complex).

  
Author's notes: Trip's POV.  


* * *

I've been leaning against this wall so long my legs have gone to sleep. If I had to move I'd fall over. A smile curls my lips at the thought and it's odd isn't it, how even in the depths of despair you can still find things funny? It's not right, my subconscious mocking me like this.

Did I just say those words out loud? Good job it's the middle of the night, if such a thing could be said to exist out here, less people around to notice me going quietly mad.

From here I can see the door to Malcolm's quarters, there are other doors too but his is the only one I'm interested in. They're in there, Malcolm and the Cap'n and just to torture me my brain keeps projecting pictures of what they might be doing on the inside of my skull.

The worst thing though is what I saw just before the door closed. Malcolm was pinned up against the wall by Jon and those grey eyes of his they were brimming over with desire, the way one day I had hoped they'd look at me.

Not that I've been standing out here ever since though. A man has to deal with his emotions in private and that's what I did. I went away, I dealt with them and then I came back. I'm not sure why. What am I gonna do? Cook up some elaborate emergency in which the engines are about to explode just to separate them? I'd be busted down to steward for endangering the ship and I wouldn't blame the Cap'n for doing it either.

'Sides I only have myself to blame for this fiasco. Think I've tried to hide the truth, even from myself, but it's god's honest truth. Beats me why I got involved in the first place, guess I was just trying to be a good friend, I won't make that mistake again in a hurry.

* * *

So me and the Cap'n, we're sitting in his quarters having a nice companionable drink when out of the blue he starts talking about Malcolm.

"So do you think he'll ask for a transfer?"

"What?" I hadn't been listening.

"Malcolm," Jon looked up at me and I forced a smile. "I know you're friends and I just wondered if he'd said anything."

"About what?"

"His problem with me." He sounded genuinely worried. I guess Jon's one of those people who likes to think that everybody likes him.

"I wasn't aware that he had." The intense worry on Jon's face scared me a little. I'd never known him to be quite this concerned about how someone might or might not feel about him before. "Look I'll talk to him for you, least I can do."

You know if I had my time back again I wouldn't say those words, maybe then I wouldn't be stood here like some spare part but of course I did say them and that meant that I had to talk to Malcolm.

* * *

First time I met Malcolm I was convinced I wouldn't like him. He was so buttoned up I doubted that he ever got undressed even to take a shower, (ain't that a picture?). But little by little I got to like him, eventually I even got to feeling I knew him a little bit and then one day I think I fell in love with him. Now I'm no expert on these feelings but increasingly often I'd find myself seeking him out, talking Travis and Hoshi into games of poker just so as I could spend more time with him, going down to the Armoury with stupid questions about the phase cannons, that kind of thing.

So I guess what I'm saying is that on the face of it I was looking forward to talking to Malcolm about Jon. I should have known better.

"He cares," I said slowly, "that doesn't make him a bad captain."

Malcolm's grey eyes were wary but there was anger in his voice when he replied. "That isn't what I meant. It's just he makes it difficult to work under his command."

"Why?" Trip Tucker you're an idiot but there was no wishing the words back into my mouth.

"Because I like him." I didn't quite catch the words the first time so I asked him again. The second time I didn't hear him over the sound of my heart breaking.

"In fact I think I love him."

One of these days I'll stop doing that. One day I will actually stop to think before I open my big mouth.

Remembering the rest is too painful right now. Remembering the rest is why my eyes feel so sore.

There's a faint noise and I see Malcolm's door is open. Jon's standing there, his uniform jacket flung carelessly across his left arm, just looking at Malcolm. There's a look of desolation on his face but my own pain is too acute to allow for sympathy. From where I'm standing I can see Malcolm too. His knees are drawn up to his chest but his eyes are open.

Jon steps back and the door closes. He's going back to his quarters and as he turns he sees me. There's no acknowledgement, no friendly nod of the head or smile from either of us.

Why is he leaving? If it had been me in there wild horses couldn't have dragged me away. Jon's gone and my feet have brought me to Malcolm's door, so what am I gonna do?


End file.
